Goodbyes are considered to be blessings in most cultures . Blessings that will wish each other good luck for the times to come; being thankful for the wonderful times spent together. Most times you know that you are saying goodbye. You're at the airport or at the train station and you wait until she has turned a corner or the train has started moving and you have no sight of her anymore. The one saying goodbye, just tends to linger in the moment. Trying to figure out, what exactly happened. Wondering if he really said something meaningful so that he could express exactly how hard it was to say goodbye. I remember, once when I was saying goodbye to a friend, I just stood there at the door and we stared at each other, so hard -- as if in that moment she knew everything I had to say -- almost reaching out to my soul and pulling it out until the doors of the subway closed and brought me back to life.
You say goodbye to a person you've made some memories together with, to a city where you once lived, to the smell, the food and the beauty the city has to offer even in its dark crevices and smelly corners. Sometimes you say goodbye with a smile and sometimes you say goodbye with a sprinkle of tears. That's how I said my last goodbye to New York City . I remember, I was at Union Square . Me and some of my friends had frozen yogurt in the village -- the one where you can pick as many flavours as you want, get countless toppings and pay based on the weight. I stood there, below this tree and the statue of the Suicide man on top of one of the buildings at Union Square. I tried to fit most of that visual imagery in my memory, save it in my hard drive- never to be lost. And I balled, I cried like a baby, mostly because I thought I might not get back there soon. And I haven't, yet . Maybe in those tears I lost some of the visual data. Because I cant remember it vividly . I've always been horrible at saying goodbyes. I've hated departures of any kind and it always tears me apart to let go.
But sometimes, you will not even realise but you might have already said your last goodbye. You will not realise what hit you and she'll already be gone. Flash! Boom!
You might have already got in and out of the car, kissed on the cheek--trying to not let the driver notice it from the corner of his eye, wondering why these two people are kissing in the first place -- and said see you later 'sweetie' or something . That's not how the Indians say goodbye, he must wonder . But yes, you've already said goodbye and I've bid you adieu without noticing that we have already seen the last of each other. In that moment, I've kissed goodbye to the tattoo of the gecko on your wrist . I don't remember which hand - left or right. Thought I'd kissed it too many times to not forget. But I forgot .
And maybe you forgot to share that connection between the heart and the breath for one whole breath; you forgot to say goodbye.
You say goodbye to a person you've made some memories together with, to a city where you once lived, to the smell, the food and the beauty the city has to offer even in its dark crevices and smelly corners. Sometimes you say goodbye with a smile and sometimes you say goodbye with a sprinkle of tears. That's how I said my last goodbye to New York City . I remember, I was at Union Square . Me and some of my friends had frozen yogurt in the village -- the one where you can pick as many flavours as you want, get countless toppings and pay based on the weight. I stood there, below this tree and the statue of the Suicide man on top of one of the buildings at Union Square. I tried to fit most of that visual imagery in my memory, save it in my hard drive- never to be lost. And I balled, I cried like a baby, mostly because I thought I might not get back there soon. And I haven't, yet . Maybe in those tears I lost some of the visual data. Because I cant remember it vividly . I've always been horrible at saying goodbyes. I've hated departures of any kind and it always tears me apart to let go.
But sometimes, you will not even realise but you might have already said your last goodbye. You will not realise what hit you and she'll already be gone. Flash! Boom!
You might have already got in and out of the car, kissed on the cheek--trying to not let the driver notice it from the corner of his eye, wondering why these two people are kissing in the first place -- and said see you later 'sweetie' or something . That's not how the Indians say goodbye, he must wonder . But yes, you've already said goodbye and I've bid you adieu without noticing that we have already seen the last of each other. In that moment, I've kissed goodbye to the tattoo of the gecko on your wrist . I don't remember which hand - left or right. Thought I'd kissed it too many times to not forget. But I forgot .
And maybe you forgot to share that connection between the heart and the breath for one whole breath; you forgot to say goodbye.
