Rains - Romantic?

"We see only what we wanna see"

So, I'm a 'water' sign -- Cancer. But, apart from having personality traits like my element water; I'm not particularly fond of it. And I certainly do not find the rains romantic. Cancerians are ruled by the moon. But i have no affinity to the moon either. In terms of romance, it does not tingle me when someone says -- No matter how far apart we are, we will both look at the same moon and under it, we both will feel 'closer'. Blah!!

For me, there is no "walking or singing in the Rain". And there is no 'crying' in the rain to hide my tears either. The gathering of the clouds and the grey-gloomy ambient light do not bring out the best in me. It only makes me sad and pathetic; which for the most part I already am. Kidding. But frankly, I do not need the blazing hot sun to hide behind the clouds to feel that way. I'm happy with it shining on my face. My friend once told me, do not move to Canada; it's always grey there. So I'm guessing I will avoid that to save myself from some seriously depressing days.

The monsoon has just hit India and I'm already looking for excuses to not step out of the house that much. The rains should bring out this beautiful fragrance that I used to love when I was a kid. But, yesterday I stepped outside my house after a drizzle and I could only smell -- concrete. Errrrrr! And I must tell you, this is not a good smell. I turned a corner and saw that the smell of the garbage lying around was heightened even more because of the drizzle. Is that romantic? I don't think so.

Would you really walk hand-in-hand with your lover, feeling all the butterflies in your stomach dancing around; while the rains are pouring cats and dogs on you? I guess not. Yes, you could hide under an umbrella and koochie-koo; but, with the rains, the winds will start blowing harder and your umbrella will fly away. What is so romantic about a flying umbrella when you need it the most? Imagine this, your umbrella just flew away. Suddenly, there is a loud noise. It is the roaring thunder and the cracking of the lightning that gives you an excuse to pretend to be scared and hold your lover tightly. You gasp. Just then, a car passes by and splashes muddy water that drenches the two of you. Tell me, what can be more unromantic than that. Hugging someone and having the bad taste of mud in your mouth, all at the same time. 

So, no. I don't find my romance in the rains. I do not feel like dancing around the trees when it pours. But, maybe you do. I told you, it's all about what you wanna see.

Not Like the Movies

So, the day is over. You brush your teeth, drink your water and are ready to tuck yourself into bed; unless your mom still does that for you. But you can't sleep just yet. A stream of thoughts runs through your head. They say that your thoughts eventually become your dreams. I think all of the thoughts get mixed up. But in your dreams, somehow it all makes sense.I wish real life was the same. Wish that it all made sense. But you know what, mostly it doesn't. Its that irritating feeling; If you're inside the blanket it's too warm and if you throw it away its too cold. You just can't find the right balance.

Every now and then there comes a point in your life when everything seems strange. Nothing is going to work out as planned. Nothing will inspire you to work harder or try to give that one last push; that last attempt to see if you are successful. What do you do when a time like that dawns upon you? 

I, usually, take a few steps behind, sit back, relax, make my popcorn handy and get ready to watch a movie with the re-enactment of all that has happened in the past few days. My movies always revolve around the people I meet, the experiences I have, the things that don't seem to work out, failed trials and judgement errors. With all this, there's always a parallel 'love story' running in the background. Like, it was from a Bollywood movie with a very interesting plot that deliberately forced a romance between the characters so that they could hold the attention of the masses as well. And typically, my movies also have a lot of drama.

I'll cite a few scenarios. You meet your soul mate and the distance gets in your way. The longest relationship you ever had is thrown out of the window because he/she is not ready. A perfectly compatible couple can't be together because there is a huge difference in their age. You have cold feet. You run away from something without sparks thinking what if I can find something better. You think, what if? 

These in turn raise so many other questions that interestingly, only extras in the movie will raise. Never the important characters. Would people call you names? Will the society approve? What would they talk about a couple with a huge difference in age? Will his family be able to accept them? Does his family know about it? Does the family take preference over your own needs OR you sacrifice your will just because you want to be a good son/daughter? OR do you let everything go for a toss because you've always been a rebel and this is the one chance you might have at something that might never come back?

Eventually, these are just thoughts. Everyday thoughts. You don't end up making any concrete decisions. You decide that you will pause this movie here and let it continue when you get to your bed tomorrow again. 

You think, maybe tomorrow it will end differently, maybe tomorrow just like my dreams things will sort themselves out, maybe tomorrow everything will make sense like it always should in THE END.